Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker (2001) and Filthy McNasty (2002)

Cast: Missy Donatuti, Chris Seaver, Mike Nicolai, Debbie Rochon, Miss Kitty and Tim Ekkebus

Writer: Chris Seaver

Director: Chris Seaver

Since the DVD is a double feature presentation, I thought I'd make my review a Double Feature Review. Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker and Filthy McNasty, were the second and third films I got to see from the LBP library. I don't quite remember how I got the DVD, but if I had to recap I'd say, It was a dark and stormy night in Villa John Stamos, when an odd little hairy man approached me and fondled me inappropriately and said "It's Boy". No that doesn't work either, however, these films sunk me deeper into the wild world of LBP and made me even more of a fan craving more of their tasteless delicious flavor.

In "Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker", we follow Mulva (Missy Donatuti), an eccentric young girl who is addicted to sugar who is about to embark on a Halloween crusade for plenty of candy to fill her candy lust. Along with her morbidly Obese side kick Cassie (Calley Thidemann), the two have several run ins with Mclargehuge (Mike Nicolai) and is evil side kick Takateru (Joe Anime), an interesting run in with Lady McPouchsweat (Debbie Rochon) and her husband J. Vanbrunt (Trent Haaga)and of course a run in with a horde of malicious break dancing zombies trying to rule Tromaville and ruin Halloween. Joined and led to fight by the bad ass Mr. Bonejack (Chris Seaver), Mulva heads to the town square where they're also joined by Teen Ape (Teen Ape) and his sexy tromette in hopes to save tromaville to get filled with the Mayor's (Lloyd Kaufman) chunky dick snot.

The film is of course shot on a low budget and like many has short run time, but is insanely hilarious. I have a heart for true indie when it's done correctly and well LBP certainly does deliver on that scale. You get your share of bloody cheesy death and gross out humor in this lovely little Halloween treat as well as a fun little dance sequence and a Benny Hill Homage. It gives me a warm wet spot in a very very special place. (My hear you perverts) I definitely felt a win purchase with buying this one, All that wackyness is right up my... alley? And definitely get's a well deserved five candies out of five. Yep I said it, bitch!

In "Filthy McNasty", we follow the geeky geekness of Julie (Debbie Rochon) and Liz (Ms. Kitty) as they yearn to be hot and popular and have no idea how to make their dreams come to fruition. They are later visited by an odd classmate who has them partake in an evil ritual to give them their desires. Julie is visitor in her sleep by Phil (Tim Ekkebus) the demon that grants their wish and tells them he will eventually collect, when she awakens her and Liz are now smoking hot, mouth watering babes that take their school by storm and are immediately invited to a bash with all the all the popular kids. A bash so great Teen Ape shows up, a bash so great someone masturbates with shit, a bash so great Phil decides it's time to come and collect by raping and killing everyone until Bonejack comes along and saves the day.

Again, more tastefully tasteless humor in all of it's glory. One thing I loved and couldn't stop laughing about was the box of "Mario Van Pebbles" cereal, that was just a stroke of genius in my opinion. The randomness of this film and many a film in the LBP library can be equal but unmatched to many of the great screwball comedies of the past. That totally gives this delicious bowl of bad taste five refills of cereal out of five.

Overall, both films are definitely win in my book and I have to admit I have yet to be disappointed by LBP, you get what you pay for, but they do it right. I've seen films that seemed to try to mimic similar gross out humor and fail cause all I can think was "They're trying to hard to be LBP" to the point where they had certain lame characters re-appear in other of there films. There is only own LBP and can be only one and again as the doors close, it's great to have bared witness to some of the greatest truly independent releases and I can only wish there were more demented minds out there like my own that could equally love the hysteria. But at least us, the cult that follows don't keep a proverbial cynical cinema stick up our asses and run around critiquing the little guy with our Hollywood budget bull hockey and our over zealous film knowledge like many out and about. We appreciate the lower things in life cause frankly they entertain us, film should always be meant to entertain and most of the time "Bad Taste" is the best taste to have. This full DVD package gets ten out of 10

10/10

Quest For The Egg Salad (2002)

Cast: Jesse Green, Chris Seaver and Tim Ekkebus

Writer: Chris Seaver

Director: Chris Seaver

Feels like not too long ago I was introduced and possessed by the insane world of Low Budget Pictures. The not having the ability to follow with extreme loyalty, I have been allowed to get my hands on what few and proudly owned films that are in my collection. I still recall back to my first encounter with an LBP film. It was "Quest For The Egg Salad". While watching, I wasn't really paying attention cause I was cleaning and such but one scene caught me and made me restart the whole film, in which I laughed my ass off and my mom whom I was living with at the time said "this movie is retarded just like you" whilst watching and laughing her ass off as well. So in the wake of Low Budget Pictures closing their doors, I decided I will HONESTLY review the films I have seen so far. I emphasize on honesty because as I said before I don't suck up and these as are many of my reviews are my honest opinions and thoughts on the film or films in my blog.

The film is a slick and subtle blend of fantasy parody and gross out comedy and what a mix it is indeed because it's extreme underground humor, better yet LBP's extreme underground humor is unmatched. Mixing nostalgia and reference into each film definitely gives them a thumbs up from myself and many LBP fan's of the like. The story is in the vain of "Lord of The Rings" but with a better ending and not amazingly long and boring, where a group of mighty warriors must stop the evil Goblin King from tasting the egg salad for he'd rule the land with darkness. Joined by the cunning of a beautiful elf, these proud warriors set out on their adventure. Encountering battles with the minions of The Goblin King, and facing even crueler beasts such as Elegant Elliot the brood continue to march on to their feat and never back away as the true warriors they are

This film is really not for everyone, but indeed a cult classic amongst much films to offer in the LBP library. I have yet to be disappointed by the films I've seen so far and hell they're honest about their films they're "Low Budget Pictures" so if you can't dig with that shiz-nit you can suck Bone Jacks big black dick.The production quality isn't too bad either for it being low budget, it looks decent and the sound is clear, so suck it up jerkies. Plus how can one love independent films, when micro-budget and low budget are truly and honestly independent films? This may not be everyone's cup of tea but It's mine for sure.

The plot is pure satire and get's funnier as the film progresses, the Dvd also includes a making featurette which also offers a Hysterical intro by the late "Michael Jackson". There are references too many films, music and so on and it gives off an even better blend to the humor. The dialog in the film is insane and random and you feel like you're on a great acid trip on the way to the funny farm and that definitely is a great thing.I've had several parties where I showed and it made sides split and everyone of course thought Teen Ape was the man, cause he is.

This film, like many of the others, is definitely for fans of Troma and fans of the cult underground altogether. I highly recommend this and many other titles to anyone that can appreciate truly independent cinema. There are a lot of Independent companies and Directors out there that deserve more praise and credibility for their work, Chris Seaver and LBP are definitely one of the many and it's sad to say goodbye, but in my heart LBP will always remain insane and never forgotten. Stick around for more LBP reviews on my blog and with that "Quest For The Egg Salad" reigns an enchanting five egg salads out of five. "Now I want a fucking egg salad"

5/5

The Good, The Bad, The Subhumanoid: Class of Nuke 'Em High Part III

Cast: Brick Bronsky, Lisa Star and John Tallman

Writers: Lloyd Kaufman, Stephen Gerard, Eric Louzil, Carl Morano, Jeffrey W. Sass, Matt Unger, Mark F. Roling

Director: Eric Louzil

I finally had the chance to watch this one summer of 96, if my memory serves correctly. During Cinemax's "Month of Teenage Troma" and I was extremely excited to see it as well. Being such a Troma fan at a young age, anything that was tossed at me was a treat, even more so when it was a sequel to one of my favorite films. Of course I've still been adamantly awaiting the fourth installment in the series, but some how feel it's very unlikely to happen, although it's mentioned here and there and they had or have several scripts if I'm not mistaken. It will definitely be great to see what is cooked up now for a sequel, but may not work unless it marks the return of Brick Bronski or there's just the right plot to tie them all together then again it's Troma they can do whatever the hell they want!

"Class 3" Picks up right where the second one left off, all the ending carnage and Roger trying to save his lovely sub-humanoid. Tromie is hit with a mega nut bomb and the day is saved, Roger becomes Mayor of tromaville and has twins, that end up killing their mom during the birth process. One is stolen and Roger never knows of it and raises Adlai (Brick Bronski plays Roger, Adlai and Dick) whom is a peaceful intelligent super sub-humanoid, where as his brother is raised by the hands of the evil Professor Holt (Lisa Gaye) and her gang led by the younger brother of the Squirrels.

The plot as usual is tromatastic craziness and I think I enjoyed this one more than the second, though I love the second as well. It was a weird yet cool way to wrap up the series and didn't have as much stock footage as "Toxie 3" (though Toxie 2 and 3 were originally set to be one film) It's great to see the return of Brick Bronsky amongst the new characters and random cameos. Call it bad taste if you will, but I can't seem to find anything wrong with the series, aside for the fact I'm still dreaming and waiting for IV. I find it kind of funny that Toxie had a set of twins which is paving the way for the now confirmed sequel of the series "The Toxic Twins: The Toxic Avenger V"

The fx are still cheese grade greatness which always bring a smile to my face and a warmth to my heart. You have your serving of death of course starting with the ending chaos of 2 and ending with, well you can't spoil for those that may have not seen it and if you haven't you can order the special edition along with other great titles here on the web, simply go to www.troma.com and place your order.

Overall, as I stated I loved it and it was the perfect strange end, to the perfectly strange trilogy. It will always hold a place in my heart and I still watch it often, along with many other great titles in my film library. Though I didn't have much to say or give much of a break down, it's for more means, like I tend to mention, For the fans of cult that haven't seen it to see it. I hope many that haven't seen it can get the same enjoyment from the film that I have and it always pleases me when I get to show the trilogy to an unintroduced friend and we end the night quoting the films or them claiming to be a sub-humanoid and so on. It's always a treat to be tromatized and with so this bad mother gets a four and a half out of 5.

4.5/5

Class of Nuke 'Em High Part II: Subhumanoid Meltdown (1991)

Cast: Brick Bronsky, Lisa Gaye and Leesa Rowland

Writers: Lloyd Kaufman, Eric Louzil, Carl Morano, Mark F.Roling, Jeffrey W. Sass, Matt Unger

Directors: Eric Louzil, Donald G. Jackson

After my encounter with the original "Class" I was lucky enough to see the sequel, one reason I used to love Cinemax back then. The second film in the trilogy had different Directors on board this time, but back then I never paid attention to credits really. As far as I was concerned all that mattered to me was seeing "Lloyd Kaufman and Michael Herz Present A Troma Team Release". If I saw that I was sold on the idea of it being gold. Some Troma movies are terrible, no doubt about it, but since I was young Troma was always about the Kaufman and The Herz. I don't automatically negate any of the other films from other directors, but we all know in actuality that's what Troma is. Sequels can be good or bad as well all know due to falling into the right hands or the wrong hands in both writing and directing. So where does this charming sequel end up?

After the eminent destruction of Tromaville High School, the school becomes reconstructed as a College? A vivacious professor experiments creating her own brand of humanoid known as sub-humanoids, which have know feeling and know no emotion at all. The Professor then decides to conduct an experiment using her sub-humanoids to pleasure unlikely students on campus, where a young reporter decides to try his luck and ultimately falls in love with the sub-humanoidette and tries to be in a relationship with her. The campus is also overrun by a new gang known as the Squirrels whom torment and torture students on the campus as well as sub-humanoids. Then the sub-humanoids begin to meltdown and all hell breaks loose on campus but the biggest problem is a 30 foot rodent on the prowl.

The plot is cool and ironic since its a college now and of course Troma breeds all types of irony which is never a bad thing. This one focuses more on just one main character and is narrated by him through out the film, as the film begins in the midst of chaos and his story is the build up. There's also a cameo appearance by Toxie which is random and funny. The plot doesn't really rival the first film, but can't be discredited cause it's not a refried sequel. Its definitely different but with similar premise and isn't the greatest sequel ever made but is a pretty good sequel nonetheless. It has it's share of laughs and randomness and still holds up as a Troma film.

The body count is pretty high, seeing that sub-humanoids are melting all over the place and a giant squirrel is kicking ass and taking names. The death scenes range from pretty bloody to awesomely goofy and really add more fun into the mix. We still get some foaming deaths and such, and our squirrel throws in a mix of piss and stomping into the agenda as well, making this Definite Troma buffet. A lot of cheese and crackers indeed.

Overall, I thought it was a pretty cool sequel, but it definitely isn't up to par with the original. It's more like it's own element in ways but that doesn't make it too much of a bad thing. There's a lot of chicks in bikini's, a lot of very odd outfits and it makes a blend of what I like to call "Toxic Punk" and I consider the entire trilogy to be just that a "Toxic Punk Trilogy". I loved "Tromie" and thought it was random yet cool to throw in a giant squirrel cause after what caused the destruction of the first school in the original, you gotta go big. all and all I think it's worth seeing again if you haven't seen this and are a Troma fan, I feel it passes more as a sequel as opposed to some other sequels I will review later in my blog. With that "Class of Nuke 'Em High II: Subhumanoid Meltdown" gets four giant rodents out of 5.

4/5

Class Of Nuke 'Em High (1986)

Cast: Janelle Brady, Gil Brenton and Robert Prichard

Writers: Richard W. Haines, Mark Rudnitsky, Lloyd Kaufman, Stuart Strutin

Directors: Richard W. Haines, Michael Herz, Samuel Weil (aka Lloyd Kaufman)

Remember back when TV was cool? I do, MTV played music, USA had "Up All Night", TNT had "Monstervision" and so on. During the summer time Cinemax used to have a month of Troma, where every Weds evening they would give if I recall one or two terrific Tromasterpieces. One Faithful evening, seeing at my young age I was exposed to "The Toxic Avenger" and it turned me into the Tromaniac I am today, I had the opportunity to watch "Class of Nuke 'Em High". Knowing it was from the creators of "The Toxic Avenger" I knew it would be nice and violent and of course goofy and cheesy, just the way I like it. Sure enough it further sucked me into the world of Troma and helped mold my rotten mind for the future.

The film is set in the mythical town of Tromaville, NJ at Tromaville High School, which is near a nuclear power plant that seems to be effecting the school and pupils of the school. The honor society, now a gang of vicious cretins called the Cretins, are forcing their drugs upon students and causing bad in the school. Soon enough they purchase some super weed from their connect at the power plant and call it an atomic high and start to sell it off. It isn't before long that an unsuspecting couple get their virginal hands on the weed and smoke only to have a night of awesome sex followed by days of nightmares, odd transformations and sickness, which leads them and the school into bigger troubles than they can handle.

The plot is great in my opinion, it's such a different take on High school B movies, most are slashers of some sort, which isn't a bad thing, but this one is totally outrageous, different, and definitely a Troma film. I like the characters in the film both good and bad. They all have something to offer and grow attached to, even if it is something radioactive. The Cretins, lead by Spike (Robert Prichard) offer up everything from beautiful and tough girls to pierced wackos and a tranny. While Warren (Gil Brenton0 and friends have their cheerleader, bozo buddies and air headed girlies. The dialog brings each of these characters their own persona that you can't help but love if you're a fan of the cult that is.

The death toll, is pretty high though the film isn't as gory as "The Toxic Avenger" it has it's share of nasty and odd. From oversized erections to instant pregnant belly, to a fist being shoved down someones throat and so on. You have all the right fixings of what makes this film an instant Troma classic. The rest of the fx are of course signature as well, with the green foaming and so on it just Screams Troma in every way and it looks great to boot.

Overall, I hold this film, with many other B films dear to my heart and am very glad to have experienced this at a young age. It's fun, nasty, weird and just Troma at it's finest and I highly recommend to any Troma fan whom shamefully may have not seen this flick. Which is highly unlikely since netflix exists. I miss the frustrating times I had looking for Troma titles and other great film selections as well. Sure I love the fact that I can get them in my hands and part of my collection now with no problem, but the venture was the game of "seek and ye shall find" and with most great movie markets shut down, it's kind of sad. Though the knock at my door with a package of goods is still one of rewarding factors. One rewarding factor is that Class of Nuke 'Em High gets five cretins out of five.

5/5

Slime City (1988)

Cast: Robert C. Sabin, Mary Huner and T.J. Merrick

Writer: Greg Lamberson

Director: Greg Lamberson

When I was a kid and video rental stores ruled the earth, I would always wander and peruse the horror section. This was one of many films as a kid I was not allowed to see cause my mom thought the cover was too disgusting. Many years later, while shopping for DVD'S, I see it as a new release and without question, just to ease my curiosity I buy it.Now I never seen or heard anything about this movie and even then I wasn't so active with the internet and such, I would just buy on instinct and intrigue unless it was something I did hear rave on or read up on in Fangoria. At most with this I read the back of the box and it further intrigued me into buying it cause it sounded just about right to my liking. Now on to my thoughts of the infamous "Slime City".

Many may wonder what a film like "Slime City" is about, well the film is about a young college student in the hunt for an apartment and so he finds a nice little affordable place. But the neighbors of this building are a bit odd. He's given strange wine and yogurt by them and starts to not feel well. He starts to become slimey and grows a rage to kill. Later he finds out each of his neighbors were all like him and have had their bodies taken over by the original occupants of the building which were all members of a cult.

That's the synopsis in a nutshell cause if you haven't seen this film, you MUST. This is really on the top of my list of cult classics and I highly recommend it. The plot is cool and very B with of course the horror elements, you do grow a like for the characters of the film, even as odd as some my be the all offer some form of wacky and odd input into the film and help make it great. It definitely as all the means and correct elements of it being the cult classic it is and the acting isn't half bad either.

The violence and bloodshed is also great and very different adding to the weirdness factor of this film and throwing off any form of being predictable, whereas one man's hand is eaten by a stomach. One of many odd yet awesome scenes in the film. Sure the film isn't swamped in gore but it is a gory fun flick and I'm sure it's appreciated by plenty of cult followers and will be by future followers as well.

Overall, I feel this was one of the best purchases I've ever made on a film with almost no input on, cause it was totally worth the value I paid for and introduced me to another film by Lamberson which I liked alot as well called "Naked Fear" Which comes as an extra feature on the DVD. I still plan on buying the "Grindhouse Collection" of "Slime City" cause it brings a few other films by Lamberson as well and I still can't wait to get my filthy mitts on the long awaited sequel to "Slime City" known as "Slime City Massacre" which Im certain is great. "Slime City" is a definite must for fans of the B and cult and is a royal gem in my collection that will alway be cherished and seen, This film beyond the shadow of a doubt gets five slimey corpses out of five.

5/5

Street Trash (1987)

Cast: Mike Lackey, Bill Chepil and Vic Noto

Writer: Roy Frumkes

Director: J. Michael Muro

Back in the early 90's when I was a kid and my family moved to an area here in the Bronx that actually had cable, I was introduced to many great channels and shows. One of which was "Short Attention Span Theater" on Comedy Central, which if I remember correct would air Friday evening/ Saturday morning at 12:00 am. This program would show clips from movies and the hosts would say funny jokes about it and so on. Through this show I became obsessed with many B-Horror films and not to mention "USA'S Up All Night" as well. But it was this show that gave me my first glance at the film that I obsessively searched for until it was finally released on DVD. That film is "Street Trash" and this review will unlock the answers as to the film being worth the wait or a prolonged disappointment.

The plot of this film, is most certainly B and definitely original, A liqour store owner finds a mysterious case of booze in a hidden sealed of compartment in his store. He decides to sell the booze called Viper to all the homeless gents that bother him regularly for just a dollar. Unaware that Viper has more bite than expected and turns these homeless folks in to molten puddles of neon goo. The homeless population are lead by an ex vet whom most of them answer too except for to brothers. So you have all types of hijinks with this homeless crew in the junk yard they occupy, viper and more.

The characters are very fun and add delete to the film in many ways, they range from funny, to odd to flat out wtf? You have your bad ass no nonsense cop, your superior king of the bums, your good brother bad brother, the horny owner of the lot, his assistsnt he keeps trying to bang and the rest of the wacky "Flatbush Foot Brigade". The acting is good for a B-flick cause many have very bad acting but can still hold a torch of proud cult cinema and this film is definitely one that is stand alone and has it's own torch that can hold and like many a great B-movie still hasn't been matched to.

The death toll, is pretty good serving up some strange death scenes and weird gooey gore scenes, it definitely makes "Street Trash" a one of a kind experience. The gore is good though you get some body parts here and there an explosion and a lot of melting bums. It's not really a gore film, but it does serve up a nice helping of death and a whole lot of funny carnage.

Overall, this film was worth the wait as impatient as I was to see it. When purchasing it I became even more eager to see it and once finally watching it, was completely satisfied by it. It has the feel of a classic Lloyd Kaufman film, but at the same time it doesn't. It definitely does stand next to greats like "The Toxic Avenger, Class of Nuke 'Em High and so on, and is just as stand alone. I would have loved a sequel but at the same time and glad there wasn't one cause the film is perfect as is. With that said, I high recommend to fans of the B if they haven't had the chance to see this film yet and give this film five cans of booze out of 5.

5/5